krempuff | keep it covered, I need you to run to me

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keep it covered, I need you to run to me

It had been a few days since the party at Semele's, which of course meant it had been a few days for Darrow to see that Krem's life had gone sideways in the worst kind of ways. Still, he was well aware that dwelling on his anxieties wasn't going to solve anything. After he'd discovered Aggie's disappearance, he'd been vocal in his protest against the statements that those that had disappeared had just, like so many others, returned home. The whole mess of it stank. And he'd dealt with enough corrupt situations to know the stink of it when he encountered it. But tonight wasn't about that. He'd done everything that he could for now. And for now, all he could do was wait and hope.

So he'd let Thomas know that he had an evening and day off in a row--a rare occurrence for him, and he planned to spend the day tomorrow filled with looking for Aggie again; but that could wait until after Thomas headed home. He knew that Thomas worked, but he let him know that the doors was open, that he was welcome to let himself in when he got here. He wasn't entirely sure when Thomas got off of work, supposing it probably depended on any number of things, but it wasn't as if Krem was likely to fall asleep.

He did wonder if he ought to put anything out in anticipation or presumption of the rest of the evening, but somehow that seemed to be asking a little too much. At this point, he'd just be glad to have Thomas there. More than ever, the quiet of the apartment was getting to him, and it would be good to have someone else there, even if just for the night, someone to be some sort of reassurance that things would be alright.

He curled up in the corner of the couch and waited, a book in his lap that he was only sort of reading.

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Krem appreciated the comfort of the words, the attempt, even if he couldn't bring himself to believe that they'd gone home. There was something premeditated about the whole thing, as far as he could tell. Aggie and Dorian had both disappeared, it seemed, when no one would notice they were gone until hours, or maybe even days, after the fact. It just felt wrong.

He pulled Thomas gently over to the couch, moving his book onto the coffee table before sitting down and tugging him along with him. Having him close was better than thinking about all this other stuff, at least for now. He ran his fingers into Thomas's hair.

"I might kiss you tonight, even though I'm not supposed to," he warned softly, smiling just a little. "So don't call the piercing authorities and tattle on me."

"I didn't even know there was such a thing," Thomas admitted, leaning into Krem's hands and trying not to make some ridiculous sound at how that felt. He sighed though and didn't try and hide that.

"I don't want you to do anything that'll hurt," Thomas said quietly. "I can do enough kissing for the both of us, if I need to. I can try, at least."

"It's not," Krem assured softly, nuzzling a little rather than laying any kisses just yet. And maybe he wouldn't. He wanted to, badly. The comfort of the physical affection that came with kissing would be nice, but just the closeness was good. Knowing that Thomas was safe as something, at least. He'd made sure that Hild was safe, after he'd found out Aggie was missing; knowing that Thomas was too was another layer of comfort, now that he knew more people were missing.

"We can still do that research, if you're not too tired from work," Krem said softly. "Or just go to bed. Or anything you'd like. I'm easy. It's just good to have you here. And I promise not to hurt myself, if I do kiss you. It's almost healed, anyway."

"It wasn't that busy tonight," Thomas said, smiling down at Krem. "I didn't have to work too hard so I'm only the normal kind of tired that comes from working. I'm fine. I don't want to go to sleep yet."

Going to the bedroom didn't sound too bad but he didn't want to sleep. He wanted to stay up and be here and see what happened.

"What do you want to do?" Thomas asked quietly. "What are you feeling like?"

Krem smiled, chuckling softly that he'd been given the reins. As much as he liked Thomas's flashes of confidence, his slightly odd sort of flirtation, he didn't mind having to make these decisions either. It felt even keel, for the most part. He knew that Thomas wanted to be here, and they both checked in with each other before they tried anything. It worked, even if they were fidgety and fumbly with each other.

Gently, he slipped off the couch and pulled Thomas along with him. From the front room, it was only a few easy steps to the bedroom. The apartment felt closer with someone else there with him.

"I don't know if you actually thought about what sort of research you wanted to do? Or if you were just joking about that. We don't..." Krem flushed, all hot across his face from his hairline to his collarbone, and laughed softly. "We can just see how things go."

Thomas followed behind Krem quietly, counting the steps, dragging his fingers along the wall, anything he could just to acclimate himself, to keep himself out of his own head. He knew that getting too caught up in his neuroses would end this night before it even began.

"I wasn't joking about that," Thomas said and his voice was low but serious. He hadn't been joking, he wanted to research or experiment or whatever you wanted to call it. "I haven't thought too much about it but I want to do it whatever it entails."

"I was thinking," Krem said, pulling Thomas gently toward the bed. He had the laptop that had been here at his arrival--which he didn't use very much but which he knew how to use, at least perfunctorily--sitting on the bedside table. "We could find a movie to watch together?"

Pornography was ridiculous and unrealistic more often than not, just as much as some of the romance novels he'd ever read, but Krem supposed that it was at least a starting point. And it wasn't as if they'd been chaste with each other.

He sat down on the edge of the bed and smiled softly. "And if it's too ridiculous, we can just make fun of it."

"A movie?" Thomas asked, trying to figure out what kind of research that might help with. He was willing to go with it, to let Krem lead for now because even if they were both inexperienced, Krem still had him beat.

"We can watch a movie, sure," Thomas said agreeably. "Did you have something in mind? Something you wanted to watch?"

Krem was quiet a moment as Thomas's agreeability washed over him, and then, a moment after, a dark, heavy flush came over him, rushing up the back of his neck and then overtaking his face. He covered his face with his hands and laughed, embarrassed, and flopped back on the bed.

It hadn't even occurred to him that, perhaps, he might miss the mark phrasing something like that. He laid there, covering his face, and thought he might just melt from the heat on his cheeks.

"Pornography," he mumbled into his palms. "I meant pornography."

"Porn -- Oh." Thomas was grateful that he, at least, knew what pornography was, that he wasn't going to have to ask Krem to explain it to him. He'd never actually watched any but he'd used his laptop enough to have come across it a time or two.

"We can -- we can try that," Thomas said, still agreeable and curious, if he was honest. "I've never watched anything like that before. They weren't exactly around back home."

Krem continued to lay there a moment, embarrassed and still covering his face as he tried to work himself out of it. Even if Thomas still sounded so good about it, Krem just felt mortified suddenly, even having suggested it.

"Like I said," Krem mumbled behind his hands again, "if it's too ridiculous, we can just make fun of it. Or turn it off. I--it's a silly idea."

If he ever crawled out from behind his hands again.

"Why are you so embarrassed right now?" Thomas asked, scooting closer to Krem's side and trying to pull his hands away from his face. He leaned closer and pressed a kiss to Krem's jaw, light but lingering.

"I wanna watch and whether we do...stuff from the movie or we make fun of it, it'll still be good," Thomas murmured. "It's okay."

"I don't know, it seems a reasonable thing to be embarrassed about," Krem said, but even that sounded silly. He let Thomas pull his fingers away from his face, sighed softly at the light kiss, even turned toward that a little bit. It was nice and more of a comfort than Thomas's easy agreement.

"I just figured," he said, looking at Thomas now, "that it was sort of what you meant, when you suggested it. Even if we were just joking. Pictures or movies or--that sort of thing?"

He was quiet a second longer before he flushed, all dark and nervous. "And apparently there's a whole niche market out there, for guys like me."

The implicit implication there was, of course, that he'd already watched some of these videos.

"It's okay to be embarrassed about it because shuck knows I'd feel the same way," Thomas assured him with a small smile. "I probably wouldn't have even been able to say the word or find videos and not just because I barely know how to use a computer."

He shrugged and glanced over at Krem's computer. "You've found one that you -- that you think we'll like? That might be good for research and stuff?"

Krem looked up at Thomas, more directly now, and he smiled finally. He still felt embarrassed and silly, a little flustered, but he knew how to be the slightly more experienced one, at least. He knew he could at least have that little bit of confidence, or act it.

He reached up and cupped Thomas's cheek, leaning up and kissing him very softly. It felt strange, with the ring in his lip, but not unpleasant at all. He let out a soft, pleased noise, just to share that soft kiss, and then sat up more fully to grab his computer.

"I might have found a, a couple." That was another embarrassing admission, though it seemed less embarrassing now that they'd moved on a little.

"Stop kissing me, you're not allowed," Thomas said though he didn't sound serious and he couldn't help but smile. He didn't want Krem to hurt himself on account of him but he couldn't help but pleased by the contact.

He glanced over at the computer again. "A couple, huh? Been doing research without me?"

Krem smiled and slanted his mouth a little, so just the half furthest from the piercing touched Thomas's lips. That felt far sillier than just kissing him, if he was honest.

"I couldn't rely on my imagination for everything," he murmured bashfully.

It was easier, then, to open the computer and navigate to where he had the videos saved. There was only a handful of them--not just with men like him, with all sorts of people, but he pulled up one that he'd found earliest.

Still feeling a little embarrassed, Krem shifted on the bed as the video started with the two young men introducing themselves and talking so candidly about what they liked sexually. He normally skipped all this, but for now he gently adjusted himself and Thomas so they could sit against the top of the bed and put the computer on the blanket in front of them.

Thomas was probably watching this with far too much concentration. It was just that he'd never seen a movie like this before and he wasn't sure what to expect. He didn't know if it would be like one of the normal movies he'd seen or if there'd be differences.

So, he leaned forward, brow furrowed while he chewed on his lower lip. It seemed pretty run of the mill right now though he couldn't stop the blush from rising on his cheeks.

He glanced at Krem briefly before his eyes went back to the movie and what was happening on the screen.

More than the movie, Krem watched Thomas. He watched his scrutiny and curiosity, the faint blush on his cheeks and the way he leaned in toward the computer a little bit. Krem wanted to pull him back gently so he could rest against him, but more than that, he wanted Thomas to be able to be comfortable with this. If he needed to lean in and thoroughly absorb the entirety of the film, who was Krem to stop him?

The film shifted from the two young men talking to them kissing and touching each other, stripping out of their clothes, and Krem was back to his bashfulness. He'd liked the film initially, the first time he'd watched it, because both of the actors in it smiled a lot, they seemed to enjoy each other, they were friendly and gentle and kind; they were also pretty, their bodies just a little soft, the young transgender man still built with his breasts and a bit of curve to his body. Now, with someone else beside him, all those things seemed shallow and silly.

He curled his knees up to his chest and watched Thomas quietly instead of the movie.

"They got friendly fast," Thomas said and then immediately winced. What a dumb thing to say. What a shucking dumb thing to say. "Wow, I'm an idiot."

He laughed though and glanced at Krem, finding Krem watching him. The blush on his cheeks deepened and he looked down before looking back up at Krem through his eyelashes.

"You're watching me," he murmured, turning back to the movie and tilting his head. "I'm not as good as this movie, I'm sure."

Krem laughed, the tension that had been building in his chest breaking softly. He shifted a little bit, moving closer to Thomas, curling against his shoulder gently.

He ran his fingers gently along his arms, glancing at the screen as the actors moved through a gambit of things that, at least, he and Thomas had already accomplished. They'd learned touching each other already, though watching it from an outside perspective was an interesting one.

"I've already seen it," Krem reminded Thomas softly. He nuzzled behind his ear gently, running his hands down to Thomas's, twining their fingers gently. "I was seeing how you thought of it."

"It's -- it's good," Thomas said and found that he meant that. He gave Krem's fingers a squeeze, eyes dancing back to the screen where things were getting much, much more intense than they had been previously.

Thomas licked his lips and couldn't stop himself from shivering at the nuzzling and the touch. He bit his lip.

"I could never do something like this," he said before realizing how that sounded. "What I mean is I couldn't...be with someone and have it filmed. I'd never manage to stop blushing. I can -- I can watch though."

"I don't think I could either," Krem said truthfully. There was a part of him that had no qualms about letting someone see him in such a vulnerable position, but that was different.

Krem slid one of his hands to Thomas's thigh, still only touching. He split his attention more evenly now between Thomas and the movie, where things were starting to ramp up beyond simple touch. It was still things they'd done to each other, though things were progressing quickly toward the inevitable next step.

"You know," Krem said softly, "we don't have to do anything different than what we have already? I like what we do. The kissing and touching we do. It's good."

"I know," Thomas murmured, looking over at Krem again. He smiled and covered Krem's hand with his own, curling his fingers and squeezing. He kept his hand there, letting Krem touch him but taking enjoyment at being able to feel where he touched, how firm he pressed, and how it made him shiver.

"But I want to know how to do other things too," Thomas told him soundly. "Maybe I won't be any good or I'll be nervous to try immediately but I want to know and I want to -- want to at least see what we can do together."

Krem hummed, soft and tuneless, as he leaned even closer to Thomas, a gentle pressure against his arm. He kissed the curve of his jaw, right where it bent and smoothed into his neck. He slid his hand slowly up the inside of Thomas's thigh, heavy and warm, until his fingers were warm and still against Thomas's crotch.

"I like the things you do," Krem said softly. "I trust you. It will be good."

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