[mid September]

[krempuff]

There had been no deliberate idea to avoid Hild, it had simply been something that had happened. They lived full lives, and had their own circles to run in. And, there was the whole business that Krem wasn't entirely sure that he ought to seek Hild out. Eowyn had assured that she had seemed pleased with their night together, but second hand knowledge was not the same as being deliberately sought out. There was, of course, the whole mess of things with Noah as well, and not quite knowing where to stand between the two of them.

He terribly disliked not knowing where to stand with people.

Now, though, he knew where she lived, and while it did seem a bit of a strange course of actions, he thought it might be a smart one to see where they at least stood on things. He needed to know, at least, if what had happened had been just that--a thing that had happened, and then he could put it to the back of his mind--or if there was some intention there that he might need to consider.

It was a good thing there was a liquor store on the way from his apartment to hers. He hoped Hild liked whiskey.

Comments

[light_of_the_world]

Hild took a sip of the whiskey, letting the pleasant burn fill her mouth and loosen her throat. People watched and judged her always, at home if not in Darrow. She knew how to manipulate those thoughts, and also how to let them slide over her, like drops of water on a duck's wing. It was not so easy for others; it had not been easy for her, at first.

"If he is honest, you must be honest also," she said. "Like approves of like. Do you hide from your war band, your other warriors, for fear they think you a danger? Men always judge. It is better to know their thoughts than to fear them."

[krempuff]

"I lie to some of the men, yes," he said, honest. Not all of them knew that he Passed, just as not all of them knew that the Iron Bull was a spy. He trusted them with his life, but even so, there were some things that you did not tell people, even when they had to keep a shield at your back.

He contemplated the whiskey with great deliberation. He did not want to suppose it was easier for someone like Hild, or like Dorian, who knew what they were and could be forthright about that. He didn't know what it was like for Hild back home, but he knew what it meant for Dorian to love men, and the dangers of that in Tevinter; they were similar to the dangers of being an invert.

Darrow was not home. He licked his lips and hummed vaguely. "If he weren't mad or upset at the idea, would there be a chance of us again...?"

[light_of_the_world]

He did not take her messaging precisely, and that was the fault of the language, her middling grasp of it. Of course you did not share all your secrets, even with those who were closest to you. This seemed natural to Hild, who held her tongue to protect those she cared about most. But what they needed to know, what affected them, needed to be said, even if difficult.

But full clarity was not necessary, as Krem seemed to have found what he needed, in his own thoughts, to make asking these difficult questions a realer possibility. This was the better way of it, not Hild coaxing him into a decision.

Hild smiled faintly and again combed her fingers through his hair. She let her nails scrape against his scalp. "Not chance," she said. "Certainty."

[krempuff]

Krem leaned into her touch slightly, a contented smile and general ease working over his face as her nails ran along his scalp. He shifted toward her in general, much like a cat, and sipped his whiskey some more, letting the warmth of the alcohol and her presence diffuse through him entirely.

"I do like the possibility of certainty," he said, soft and with a hint of a chuckle.

Now he just had to talk to Noah.